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Tagged With: pestilence


And then there were four

Dear Diary, I was right! The young lad who just moved into the house turned up today, completely out of the blue. He found the shed, which we reckon means he must be our new Death. I must say, he makes a very refreshing change from the last few we’ve had. He’s got a face … Continue reading »

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Death 10 coming soon

Dear Diary, There was a bit of excitement last night (finally!). We were just setting up a game of Ker-Plunk when who should appear but the Archangel Gabriel? Literally just appeared, no warning, no polite knock on the door. Nothing. I’ve never been a big fan of Gabriel. He’s got this smile that makes you … Continue reading »

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Someone moving in?

Dear Diary, Well War eventually made it home last night, lugging a semi-conscious Famine along in a wheelbarrow. I asked where they’d been and if he knew what happened after the poker game, but he just gave me this look and said “Let us never speak of it again,” then went and dozed off in … Continue reading »

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Third Penpal Letter

Dear Diary, Still no word back from US President Barack Obama. I’d have thought he would have replied to at least one of my previous letters by now. I’ll be honest, I’m getting a little impatient. I sent off the letter below to him this morning in the hope if gees him up a bit. … Continue reading »

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Rash update – Day 19

Dear Diary, There hasn’t been much to report in terms of rash activity (by which I mean activity of my rash, not activity that is spontaneous and ill-judged) so I haven’t been mentioning it. You know me, I don’t like to complain.

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Nothing’s Ever Simple

Dear Diary, Last night War and I popped into Blockbuster video to rent a DVD. Death had a little fold-up DVD player with built in screen, but he never let us use it. He left it behind when he went, though, so we thought a spot of movie-watching would be a nice way to pass … Continue reading »

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Where Never to Put Your Tongue

Listening to: The echoes of our laughter Mood: Upbeat Dear Diary, The impossible has happened. Last night War, Famine and I actually shared a pleasant evening in one another’s company. I think it’s just the sheer relief of us realising that Death isn’t coming back, but we were so relaxed and happy, and genuinely spent … Continue reading »

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It’s official!

Dear Diary, It’s official – we no longer have a Death! He didn’t come back, so his contract has been terminated. We’re still waiting on the formal announcement (great, more bloody trumpets) but that’s it – Death is gone. If past experience is anything to go by he’ll be changed into human form and left … Continue reading »

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Big Day

Listening to: Famine’s arteries hardening Mood: Excited Dear Diary, Today is going to be a big day for us here in the shed. Firstly, we’ve heard word that Death’s contract will be officially terminated if he doesn’t show face back here by noon today, and secondly, there’s a new Argos catalogue out! It’s almost too … Continue reading »

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Alternative Career Choices

Listening to: Silence Mood:¬†Unsettled Dear Diary, Well there’s still no sign of Death, but he must’ve been back at some point because all his gadgets and gizmos have gone. Not sure how he managed to sneak past us, but then Death can do all sorts, so there’s no point worrying about it.

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