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Tagged With: famine


And then there were four

Dear Diary, I was right! The young lad who just moved into the house turned up today, completely out of the blue. He found the shed, which we reckon means he must be our new Death. I must say, he makes a very refreshing change from the last few we’ve had. He’s got a face … Continue reading »

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Death 10 coming soon

Dear Diary, There was a bit of excitement last night (finally!). We were just setting up a game of Ker-Plunk when who should appear but the Archangel Gabriel? Literally just appeared, no warning, no polite knock on the door. Nothing. I’ve never been a big fan of Gabriel. He’s got this smile that makes you … Continue reading »

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Someone moving in?

Dear Diary, Well War eventually made it home last night, lugging a semi-conscious Famine along in a wheelbarrow. I asked where they’d been and if he knew what happened after the poker game, but he just gave me this look and said “Let us never speak of it again,” then went and dozed off in … Continue reading »

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Nothing’s Ever Simple

Dear Diary, Last night War and I popped into Blockbuster video to rent a DVD. Death had a little fold-up DVD player with built in screen, but he never let us use it. He left it behind when he went, though, so we thought a spot of movie-watching would be a nice way to pass … Continue reading »

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Where Never to Put Your Tongue

Listening to: The echoes of our laughter Mood: Upbeat Dear Diary, The impossible has happened. Last night War, Famine and I actually shared a pleasant evening in one another’s company. I think it’s just the sheer relief of us realising that Death isn’t coming back, but we were so relaxed and happy, and genuinely spent … Continue reading »

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Big Day

Listening to: Famine’s arteries hardening Mood: Excited Dear Diary, Today is going to be a big day for us here in the shed. Firstly, we’ve heard word that Death’s contract will be officially terminated if he doesn’t show face back here by noon today, and secondly, there’s a new Argos catalogue out! It’s almost too … Continue reading »

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It Was Only a Matter of Time, Really

Listening to: Tinnitus Mood: Concerned Dear Diary, Yep, it’s official – Death has gone mad. To be honest, it doesn’t come as a great surprise. He’s not the first Death to lose the plot, and I’m almost certain he won’t be the last. We’ve had nine Deaths in total now, including him. I don’t know … Continue reading »

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New Game Alert – Part 2

Dear Diary, Been back from the shops for ages, but when I got in there was a stack of ironing sitting on my chair, so I’ve been working through that for the past few hours. Trying to press Famine’s tracksuits is like trying to iron a marquee. Of course, it would help if he took … Continue reading »

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New Game Alert!

Listening to: Death muttering Mood: Disappointed Dear Diary, As I’ve previously mentioned, being one of the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse is a much less interesting job than it sounds. Largely it involves sitting around and drinking tea, which is fine for the first few thousand years, but it rapidly gets quite dull after that. … Continue reading »

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Toxie the Hellhound

Listening to: The crashing of my heart Mood: Anxious Dear Diary, We’re in big trouble. We’ve done something stupid. We’ve sheltered a Hellhound. First the rash and now this. I’m on course for one of the worst weeks of my life here, and I’ve had a very long life.

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